If you've ever wondered what habits you want to develop with your significant other, a relationship counselor says it's these.
Most people will go into a relationship hoping it will be a successful and long one; but achieving this is easier said than done.
Of course there's some obvious steps to developing a happy relationship, i.e being faithful, be kind to your partner, show up for them, and so on.
If you're lucky enough to witness these kind of relationships then it's likely you'll mimic them in your own romances. In fact, studies have shown that kids who have come from a happy marriage are more likely to model the same behaviors when it comes to their own relationships.
Advert
However, if you're not someone who has seen it in action for yourself then author and relationship counselor Comfort Omovre has done the homework for you and revealed which habits she's noticed that successful couples share.
Resounding, Frequent and Genuine Appreciation
Taking to Twitter, Comfort said: "I've found this common in every successful relationship l've been privileged to witness, including mine. Successful couples are loud about how much they appreciate each other, express their gratitude frequently over the big and especially little things, and they always mean it when they say, 'Thank you'."
Clean Fights
Some couples claim to have never argued (cough, Travis and Taylor), but this isn't necessarily a healthy habit to have.
The way you fight is key though, says Comfort. She explained: "You'll never catch successful couples fighting dirty. They neither air unclean laundry nor intentionally construct their words and actions to strike the other person where it would hurt the most.
"They've mastered the art of healthy conflict resolution over time and as such, every misunderstanding brings them closer together."
Ever Improving Sex Life
A lot of couples will speak about how their sex lives die a death as the relationship goes on, and there are different reasons why both men and women become uninterested in being intimate with their partner.
However, those who have been in a long and happy relationship don't let the fire in the bedroom dwindle.
"Successful couples do not just abandon their sex lives to tumble down the pit of no return," writes Comfort. "They're often looking for ways to spice things up in the bedroom—and most especially, outside."
"They review occasionally and honestly, set dates, plan events around getting down, and constantly try to get better at pleasing one another," she adds.
Other points Comfort listed are:
- Recurring Affectionate Gestures
- Respect and Admiration for one another
- Healthy Boundaries
- Acknowledgement of Each Other's Autonomy
- Effective Communication
- Genuine Friendship
- Endless Courtship
- Accountability and Consideration
- Balance Between Agreement and Healthy Compromise
- Proper Apologies
- Earnest Forgiveness
- Mutual Yielding
- Collaboration Over Competition
- Adequate Prioritization
- Empathy Over Ego
- Pursuit of Fulfilment
- Interdependence Over Co-Dependency
People have since thanked Comfort for her advice, with one person replying to her Twitter thread: "Looking forward to these gems, especially since my partner and I have been working on our communication lately."
A second said: "This is super loaded with wisdom. Thank you."
"This is actually very nice and educating, I’ll bookmark for the future," added another.
You can find Comfort's full list of advice here.
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Twitter, Life
Niamh Shackleton