Dating expert reveals the main reason why women stop having sex with their husbands

A relationship coach has shared why women stop being sexually attracted to their husbands and long term boyfriends.

If you're in a long term relationship, then the relationship is undoubtedly going to change over time.

You might become more accustomed to each other, change as individuals, or have children.

It's probably not realistic to expect a honeymoon period where you can't keep your hands off each other to last forever.

But what Dr. Sarah Hensley refers to in her TikTok video is something a bit more serious than things just 'levelling off' a little.

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The psychology behind the dwindling attraction

In the video, she explored why many women might stop feeling sexually attracted to their husbands.

The dating coach, who has a PhD in social psychology, acknowledged in the video's caption that there are other reasons for desire tapering off, but 'this is THE biggest reason by far'.

So, what exactly is this key reason?

Well, after laying our her qualifications and a few caveats in the video, Hensley explained.

She said: "The primary reason why women stop having sex with their husbands is because they don't feel emotionally safe.

"The reason that they don't feel emotionally safe is because their attachment needs are not being met inside of their relationship."

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So, what exactly brings this feeling about?

She explained: "Attachment needs our deepest needs inside of a romantic relationship, and if those things are not fulfilled we will not feel emotionally safe.

"Especially for women when there is a lack of emotional safety, they start feeling very unsafe giving their bodies to their partner, and they start to feel extremely un-attracted to their partner."

What exactly can we do about this?

Hensley explained the theory around attachment styles. This is a theory in psychology around the different ways that people express their attachment to someone.

It also results in people having different needs in a relationship to fulfil their attachment needs.

Hensley went through a few different attachment styles and what each of these could mean for a solution.

She explained: "The anxious preoccupied their biggest need is love, affection and reassurance. So they need lots of reassurance every single day that you love them that the relationship is stable."

But a different style needs a different response.

Hensley said: "For the dismissive avoidant woman, it's going to be space autonomy, and lack of criticism, aka peace and harmony inside the relationship."

In a nutshell - listen to your partner and understand what she needs to be made to feel fulfilled and secure in the relationship.

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