Ex South Park writer launches website to draft Barron Trump and have him join US military
The deadly exchange of missiles and drones in the Middle East, that began on Saturday with a decapitating Israeli strike on the command structure of Iran, signalled the start of a conflict that is quickly spiralling out of control.
Despite this first strike taking out the country's spiritual leader of the past four decades, Ayatollah Khamenei, alongside dozens of top officials, Iran has responded with ballistic missiles and waves of explosive Shahed drones against Israel and the American allies in the Gulf.
In response to the tragic loss of US troops in a conflict that no one voted for, including both Congress and the president's 'no new wars' MAGA base, jokers online have made a point about whose lives are at risk in this war - by getting #SendBarron trending.
With the news of half a dozen American soldiers killed in just one blast in Kuwait on Sunday, a former South Park writer has now joined their public call for President Trump to deploy the US' secret weapon, his 6'9" son Barron, as part of 'Operation Epic Fury'.
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American military families were suddenly plunged into heartbreak and grief over the weekend after Iranian explosives rained down on their loved ones, as a result of the president's decision.
So South Park writer Toby Morton has created a website to promote the campaign to send in the tallest member of the first family, called DraftBarronTrump.com.
The satirical website says in typically Trumpian language: "America is strong because its leaders are strong. President Trump proves that every day.
"Naturally, his son Barron is more than ready to defend the country his father so boldly commands. Service is honor. Strength is inherited.” It ends by adding: "Dog Bless Barron."
With Donald avoiding enlistment for the Vietnam War as a result of 'bone spurs', the site satirizes: "If you’re looking for proven genes, inherited courage, and unquestionable resolve, look no further than the Trump family."
Before we get into the practicalities of sending Trump's youngest and tallest son into the 'combat operation' where tonnes of explosive ordnance is being dropped on Iran from the US Air Force's B-1B. B-2, and B-52 heavy bomber planes, it is worth remembering that this is all a joke.
That being said, the military applications of sending in two-meter-tall Barron are potentially endless.
Perhaps the towering teen could be deployed similarly to the champions of ancient history, when both sides in a war could choose to send out their biggest guys to decide which side wins through single combat.
With the slain Iranian Ayatollah's son Mojtaba Khamenei set to be declared the next supreme leader, perhaps the two of them could settle the score and end the bloodshed that has already seen 1000 people killed in just four days, per Iran's Foundation of Martyrs and Veterans Affairs.
Barron could even have the edge in this hypothetical one-v-one, with 56-year-old Mojtaba easily dwarfed by the president's massive son, being a measly 5'10 and 37 years older than the 19-year-old NYU student.
The names of the US soldiers who have been killed in Iran
Six US soldiers have died in the Iran conflict so far after an Iranian ‘unmanned aircraft system’ hit a US command centre in Port Shuaiba, Kuwait last Sunday (March 1).
A source told CNN the attack came with no warning or sirens around 9am local time.
Parts of the building continued to burn hours after the strike.
Yesterday, the Pentagon named four of the soldiers who were killed.
These are Capt Cody Khork, 35, Sgt Noah Tietjens, 42, Sgt Nicole Amor, 39, and Sgt Declan Coady, 20.
Lt. Gen. Robert Harter, Chief of Army Reserve and Commanding General U.S. Army Reserve Command, said: “On behalf of the Army Reserve, we express our heartfelt condolences to their families and loved ones.
“We remain steadfast in our commitment to honoring the legacy of our fallen and supporting their teammates and families during this difficult time.”
Topics: Iran, Israel, Barron Trump
William Morgan