Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Adult Industry
William Morgan
Topics: Sex and Relationships, Adult Industry
One of the hardest parts of the job for a sex worker, apart from the obvious, is often the difficult work of managing their clients' emotions and maintaining a relationship with them. So you might think being married would make this harder.
A worker in the adult industry, who specializes as a dominatrix, has spoken up to say that she actually prefers it when the people who come to see her are married.
Even more surprisingly, some of their wives are even happy about it.
BDSM practitioner and writer Melissa Todd, who, according to her website, has worked in the adult industry for 30 years, made this claim in Metro, where she shared how the men with rings on their fingers are the least likely to form odd attachments.
Advert
"I can be confident he will head on his merry way home after our encounter, not giving me another thought," she said.
She shared how, unlike lonely single men, her married punters 'won’t badger me with endless messages', or even worse, talk about their jobs or grandkids.
The dominatrix explained that married men have 'another woman for that, a wife more eminently qualified'.
Todd said that a bonus was that married men rarely asked her about her private life, since they wanted to reveal as little as possible about their own.
She said: "You don’t want a client who leaves you weighed down with wretched loneliness, nothing waiting for him at home but an empty sofa and a microwave meal."
And while you can easily imagine this dynamic with lonely male clients, for Todd, it's actually her female punters that 'can be most difficult of all', with many becoming obsessed with her after one session and inundating her with messages.
"It’s a cliché, but like many clichés, born of truth — namely, that women struggle to separate sex and emotion," the dominatrix revealed.
"Having encountered me and enjoyed the fulfilment of their wildest fantasies, these women often start to assume we must be soulmates, rather than just realising I’m pretty good at my job."
She shared how many dommes in her industry actually refuse to see women for that reason.
So Todd prefers to see married men when it comes to applying her domme skills, and although many come to see her in secret, she explained that many of their wives knew exactly where they were going.
"Sometimes they encourage it, or prefer not to ask too many questions; occasionally they take an active interest," she revealed.
While this isn't a problem for Todd, she said that she is not a fan of when the husbands try to bring their wives along to their sessions, which typically involves a lot of whipping and caning.
She explained that 'it rather ruins the dynamic having a third wheel present,' but said that it does happen 'from time to time,' with their wives mostly being curious about what happens in their husbands' sessions.
"It can feel faintly surreal — like trying to work while being observed, with the odd bit of commentary thrown in," she added.
The dominatrix said that this was not her preferred arrangement, often turning her skills into a group exercise, with additional commentary and unhelpful advice thrown into the mix.
She wrote: "I like to be Queen of my domain, not have another woman insisting he deserves it for his behaviour last week, or worse, trying to tell me about her holiday plans or new hat."