Main reason why men can't get erections as 28-year-old virgin opens up about struggle
Topics: Channel 4, Film and TV, Health, Sex and Relationships
Niamh Shackleton
Featured Image Credit: Channel 4
Topics: Channel 4, Film and TV, Health, Sex and Relationships
A healthcare professional has weighed in on why so many men struggle with erectile dysfunction – younger men in particular.
ED isn't uncommon and affects around 322 million men worldwide, according to Johns Hopkins Medicine.
Physical problems can play a part in someone struggling to maintain and erection, one example being type 2 diabetes. Things like depression, alcohol use, and prostate problems can also contribute towards ED.
It's particularly prevalent in men over the age of 40, but in recent years there's been an increased rate of younger men saying they suffer with ED as well.
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One example is 28-year-old data analyst Alex, who stars on the new season of Channel 4's Virgin Island. As a result of his struggles to get an erection, Alex is yet to lose his virginity.
He explained on the hit reality TV show: "Not being able to get an erection is constantly playing on my mind. This is something old people deal with."
For younger men like Alex, doctor and psychosexual therapist Benjamin Davis says a key factor to his bedroom problems could be down to psychology.
"A lot of men with psychological erection problems have an internal voice of critic which kicks in when they have sex," Dr Davis told Metro. "It relates to shame and feeling 'I’m not good enough' or 'I’m not loveable'."
He added: "Those thoughts can become very strong particularly in a sexual circumstance."
These negative thoughts can be fuelled by the fact that someone's peers might all be having successful relationships and fulfilling sex lives.
"Seeing your peers have sexual interactions amplifies the sense there’s something wrong and can fuel avoidance of sex," Dr Davis explained.
"If you think 'I don’t want to have sex because I’m worried about something happening' it makes the fear stronger. The negative voice becomes more cruel because it’s trying to keep you safe."
This feeling of dread impacts your erection because of the increased rates of adrenaline and cortisol that comes with nervousness and overthinking. Instead of sending blood to the penis, the body sends it to the heart instead so that'll pump faster to enable you to run from danger (whether there's a physical danger to flee from or not).
In terms of addressing the issue, Dr Davis gave some advice to those who believe their ED is psychological.
He said: "Think about good sexual experiences you’ve had before or what turns you on in your fantasy world, and think how aligned that is to the kind of sex you’re having. Is it what’s pleasurable for you?
"A lot of men feel they should be having sex they’ve seen online in porn, but it doesn’t really turn them on."
He also advised that people have sex with someone they feel safe with, that way you can focus on how you feel, rather than listen to nervous thoughts in your head.