Topics: Kelly Clarkson, Celebrity, Mental Health
Kelly Clarkson has admitted she's stopped feeling 'incredibly sad deep inside' for the first time in years after a turbulent divorce.
Clarkson, 41, has been rather open about her struggles in the past, revealing she battled depression and suicidal thoughts during the early years of her career.
Speaking with Attitude magazine in 2018, Clarkson said: "I was miserable, like inside and out, for four years of my life. But no one cares because aesthetically you make sense.
"I like wrecked my knees and my feet during those four years because all I would do is put in headphones and run.
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"I was in the gym all the time. Before my show, and any time probably, because it was the one time no one was talking to me and it was the one time there was no bullshit going on.
"It was just me listening to music and checking out."
In recent years, Clarkson has acclaimed huge success on her talkshow, The Kelly Clarkson Show, notching up an impressive 13 Emmy Awards.
However, Clarkson has admitted to not being 'fully present' while making the show due to issues in her personal life.
The singer admitted she was feeling 'really unhappy' during the first few years of the show in LA before it recently relocated to New York City for season five, which premiered yesterday (October 16).
Speaking to Daily Beast's Obsessed, Clarkson said: "It’s interesting: I did a really good job of smiling and showing up for work and compartmentalizing my personal life for a few years.
"Because I was really unhappy. It was really hard. I just was never fully present."
The TV host continued: "If I’m being completely honest, I don’t know that I was ever really fully present even from Season 1, because the struggle happens, obviously, before you end up getting divorced.
"There’s stuff happening before you make that announcement."
Clarkson's relationship with Brandon Blackstock ended in 2020 after the former filed for a divorce.
The pair, who share two children together, got married in 2013 before finally reaching a settlement in March 2022 after a rather messy two years.
But now The Kelly Clarkson show is based in New York, Clarkson is ready to put her happy face on again. But this time, she won't be faking it.
"This will be the first season I’m fully present and not incredibly sad deep inside," she said.
"That’s going to be new for me: showing up and actually meaning it when I smile."
