Alec Baldwin opens up about fatal Rust shooting in new reality TV show and admits he's 'happier when asleep'

Alec Baldwin has given viewers a more intimate look into his mental state as he dealt with the fallout of the tragic Rust shooting back in 2021.

While filming for the film Rust, cinematographer Halyna Hutchins was accidentally killed by a pistol bullet from a prop gun that Baldwin was holding.

Baldwin has maintained that he did not fire the gun and had no knowledge of it being loaded with real ammunition rather than dummy rounds.

As a result of the incident, the 66-year-old Baldwin was charged with involuntary manslaughter. However, this was later dismissed during a trial in July last year.

In his new reality TV show, The Baldwins, the actor and his wife give more details about how the family dealt with the incident.

Alec Baldwin has spoken about how the trial and fallout negatively impacted him and his family (Olivia Wong/Getty Images)

Baldwin’s wife, Hilaria Baldwin, also went into the negative impact the whole trial had on her husband’s health.

She noted that everyone closest to the actor realized his mental health began to decline as a result adding that he was diagnosed with PTSD.

She also noted a rather alarming comment he made once, recalling him once saying: "If an accident had to have happened this day, why am I still here? Why couldn't it have been me?"

The actor added that during the trial period, when he was asked how he was doing, he would struggle on how to answer.

When asked, he once told a friend: "I'm happier when I'm asleep than when I'm awake."

Also shown during the first episode was Baldwin reflecting on the negative impact the whole trial had on his family, most notably his wife.

Speaking to her, he said: "This has been just surreal. I mean, I can't even believe that we're going through this, and I always feel more in pain about you than me, because I think to myself, well, you know, 'I'm going to try to my best to just get through it', and I think what it's done to you and how much it's hurt you and everything.

"This past year was just terrible. There were times I'd lay in bed. I'd go, 'Wow, my kids. I can't get up'. That's not like me. I'm not like that at all, not in any way am I like that. Never."

The couple said the family being able to support each other made dealing with the incident easier (NBC/Noam Galai/NBC via Getty Images)

The couple insisted that dealing with the incident as a family made the process more bearable.

Baldwin said: "Sometimes I'd say, 'Why did I have seven kids? Why do we have seven kids?' And I realize, to help carry me and you through this situation."

The Baldwins is set to premier in the US on TLC February 23.

• Alec Baldwin posts Halyna Hutchins tribute one year after fatal Rust shooting
• Alec Baldwin celebrates filming the final scenes of Rust nearly two years after fatal shooting
• Alec Baldwin sued by Halyna Hutchins' parents for deadly Rust shooting
• Alec Baldwin formally charged with involuntary manslaughter in Rust shooting