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Expert explains what it means if someone takes ages to reply to your texts

Home> News> Sex & Relationships

Published 19:09 3 Jun 2024 GMT+1

Expert explains what it means if someone takes ages to reply to your texts

An expert has weighed in on 'digital body language' and why it may not be a bad sign if your match takes time to message back

Poppy Bilderbeck

Poppy Bilderbeck

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Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Phones, Mental Health

Poppy Bilderbeck
Poppy Bilderbeck

Poppy Bilderbeck is a freelance journalist with words in Daily Express, Cosmopolitan UK, LADbible, UNILAD and Tyla. She is a former Senior Journalist at LADbible Group. She graduated from The University of Manchester in 2021 with a First in English Literature and Drama, where alongside her studies she was Editor-in-Chief of The Tab Manchester. Poppy is most comfortable when chatting about all things mental health, is proving a drama degree is far from useless by watching and reviewing as many TV shows and films as possible.

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A body language expert has spoken out about the importance of 'digital body language' and what it means if someone takes a while to message you back.

There's no doubt about it, being single can be fun. You don't have to constantly think about another person and their needs, you can be footloose and fancy free on a night out not having to remember to check in with your partner and you don't have to compromise when it comes to what takeaway you're ordering. However, messaging someone online and not getting a response for days is certainly not fun. But is the anxiety in your brain really right when it tells you they're taking ages to reply because they're not really that into you?

According to Tinder, 53 percent of under 30s are using dating apps to find a connection with a special someone and so messaging probably means a whole lot more than simply arranging a time and place to have a one-night stand.

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But sometimes when you message someone online, it can be hours, days or even weeks by the time they reply.

Why? Well, maybe they've had a family emergency or are busy at work or maybe, they've just ghosted you.

Body Language Expert Adrianne Carter has since given her expertise on this form of 'digital body language' and why it might not be as bad as it seems.

Just because they don't message back instantly doesn't mean they're not into you. (Getty Stock Images/ Carlos Barquero)
Just because they don't message back instantly doesn't mean they're not into you. (Getty Stock Images/ Carlos Barquero)

Carter notes daters 'often assume' if someone they've matched with online is 'slow to respond' that they're 'not that into you'.

"But the good news is that isn't always the case," she says.

The expert explains: "While quick responders indicate that someone is organised and attentive, delayed responders who are sporadic with their communication patterns could actually be more introverted, valuing deep, meaningful interactions over a high quantity of exchanges."

And this is backed up with evidence from how certain members use Tinder too.

Tinder found 77 percent of members aged between 18-24 years old reply to a crush 'within 30 minutes'. According to Carter, this shows 'their desire to really show their cards and not play games'.

However, the 'top communication style for Tinder users' is those who feel like they chat 'better in person'.

"It's no surprise that you might find that the spark is there, you just need to connect with them IRL to really see it come to life," Carter notes, urging users not to 'always take a message at face value'.

So, how about you skip the small talk and set a date for it?

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