Gerrard Kaonga
Warning: This article contains discussion of sexual assault which some readers may find distressing.
Dax Shepard has spoken about his difficulties addressing the abuse he suffered as a child and how long it took him to tell his story in his memoir.
While on his Armchair Expert podcast, the host said he is ready to open up about the childhood sexual abuse he experienced, despite the difficulty talking about. He noted that he has spoken about the topic before over the years, but has now opted to put the details of the stories in his upcoming book.
Shepard spoke about his plans to write his story while speaking to his guest, musician Marcus Mumford, who detailed his own experience with childhood abuse in his 2022 single Cannibal.
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Shepard said: “I have, for years on here, been acknowledging that I have been molested. And that was its own hurdle to just say that. And I got quite comfortable being able to say that.
"That was fine. And now I’m writing a memoir. And last year, really, the whole year was about, ‘Do I have the balls to write down the details of this?’
“The details were always going to be mine," Shepard continued. "I didn’t want anyone to be envisioning me. It’s weird that that was still some wall between my shame. Like, I can say that happened, but I don’t need you to know anything that actually happened.”
While he may be ready to share more of the details, the actor admitted that it was a difficult process to tell the story for the memoir.
He explained that he was ‘emotional’ during the four months it took him to write the story.
He added: “And when I’m writing it, I cannot help but think of people knowing this about me and how still exposed that feels."
“I was having really weird kind of spikes of emotions and moodiness," Shepard continued. "And I would forget that’s why I was having that.”
Despite the difficulty in getting everything down, he said he felt better once he finally finished that portion of the memoir.
He continued: “I finished it, and something about it existing there feels like a lot of weight is off my shoulders. But for me, there’s still the hurdle of, like, [putting the book out there].”
If you've been affected by any of the issues in this article, you can contact The National Sexual Assault Hotline on 800.656.HOPE (4673), available 24/7. Or you can chat online via online.rainn.org