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Topics: News, Health, World News
Kit Roberts
A nurse who has seen the final moments of more than 300 people revealed what she has learned.
We can't know for ourselves how we will feel during our final moments until we arrive there - though we can hope we are as comfortable and pain-free as possible.
But while we can't be sure of that until our own time comes, a nurse has shared what seeing more than 300 people dying has taught her about what really matters in life.
Listening to people in their final moment, including what they loved, and their regrets, can tell us a bit about what we should be paying more attention while we do still have more time.
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And not to sound too morbid, but there really is no knowing how long any of us has, so sooner rather than later is probably a good idea.
Laura M is a nurse who works with people in their finals days and weeks and began to record the final words of her patients, calling the final phases of life 'the quiet hour'.
Here is what she found...
One of the people Laura helped was 92-year-old World War II veteran George, who had not spoken to his brother for four decades after an argument.
George said: “I won the argument, but I lost a lifetime.”
Laura told Everyday Health that she understood that people don't die wishing that they'd been more tough during their life.
Instead, they wish that that they had been kinder.
A retired engineer revealed to Laura that he had become rich not because of any ambition, but because he was terrified of being poor.
He said: “I was so scared of being poor that I became rich in fear.”
But his fear meant that that he never actually enjoyed any of the wealth that he had accumulated.
The moral that Laura found was that there may not be a tomorrow, so don't postpone happiness.
Through our lives we will all be wronged in some way at some stage, it's entirely normal.
But how we respond to that can sit with us, as one woman felt in her final moments.
Laura recalled that she had said: "I can't die angry."
And when her estranged son arrived, she forgave him and her breathing became more restful, before she died around 30 minutes later.
One former CEO shared a mistake he had made in failing to take stock of the beautiful things around him.
He said: "I mistook being busy for being alive.”
When she asked people what they missed the most, many answered with simple things.
These were things like 'the sound of birds', 'my dog's breath in the morning', and 'the smell of rain'.
So take joy in the small things around you each day.
Of course most of us will have things that we wish had gone differently, but one person shared with Laura a particular regret.
This was: "I didn’t regret failing—I regretted never auditioning.”
So, even if you don't succeed in the end you should still try, or you will always be left wondering whether you could have, if only you'd tried.
We are more distracted than ever these days, and that can lead to this particular problem - not being present in the moment.
After all how can you enjoy what is there in front of you if you're always distracted?
One dad said: “I was always somewhere else—even when I was home.”
Living authentically can be extremely challenging, but it is also extremely important.
Pretending was one of the biggest regrets that people had on their deathbed.
One woman removed her wig, and said: “Finally, I’m done pretending.”