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Expert breaks down terrifying true meaning behind these common sex dreams

Home> News> Sex & Relationships

Published 12:50 22 Aug 2025 GMT+1

Expert breaks down terrifying true meaning behind these common sex dreams

An expert has interpreted what many common sex dreams could truly mean

Gerrard Kaonga

Gerrard Kaonga

Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Image

Topics: News, Sex and Relationships, Community, Psychology

Gerrard Kaonga
Gerrard Kaonga

Gerrard is a Journalist at UNILAD and has dived headfirst into covering everything from breaking global stories to trending entertainment news. He has a bachelors in English Literature from Brunel University and has written across a number of different national and international publications. Most notably the Financial Times, Daily Express, Evening Standard and Newsweek.

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If your steamy dreams have left you questioning what is going on in your head you are not alone and an expert has broken down what they could mean.

Sex dreams aren’t anything new and humans have likely been having them as long as we have been having dreams.

While most don’t think much about their dreams, some experts have argued that they can offer up a window into your mental state, subconscious and overall well-being.

However, just because you have ended up having sex in a dream, doesn’t mean your wants are sexual according to dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg.

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With that said, dream analysis and interpretation isn’t scientifically supported and is often touted as nothing more than a pseudo-science, so maybe take these interpretations with a big ol' grain of salt.

Sex dreams can leave many people feeling confused and wondering what is going on in their mind (Getty Stock Image)
Sex dreams can leave many people feeling confused and wondering what is going on in their mind (Getty Stock Image)

Speaking to Glamour, Loewenberg broke down what she believes could be the meaning behind these common sex dreams.

She said: “Dreams speak in a symbolic language, not a literal language.

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“Sex in a dream is not about the physical act of merging two bodies but more about the psychological act of merging two minds or merging a quality or behavior of your dream partner into your self.”

She did add that sometimes sex dreams indeed are about sexual feelings and wanting more pleasure in the bedroom.

She went on to break down some of the more common kinds of sex dreams.

Sex with an ex

This one can certainly set off a fair few alarm bells, especially if things didn’t end on good terms or you are with a new partner.

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But this doesn’t necessarily mean you want to get back with them or want to even have sex with them again, even if you miss them or the sex.

Loewenberg said it could simply be stemming from similarities between your past and current relationship, as many of us tend to go for the familiar in people when looking for partners, i.e meaning we ultimately end up with similar partners.

She added that these kinds of dreams are just helping you determine whether this ‘type’ is good for you.

Sex dreams about an ex can often leave many people feeling guilty (Getty Stock Image)
Sex dreams about an ex can often leave many people feeling guilty (Getty Stock Image)

Sex with a friend

This can certainly be an odd dream to wake up from especially if you never even considered your friend in this way.

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It might even come as a greater shock if they are not of the gender you are attracted, but these dreams are certainly common.

However, Loewenberg has argued that these dreams are more about connection than anything physical or sexual.

She has said: “A sex dream can come on the heels of having connected with someone on some level emotionally or psychologically.”

She added this is your minds way of processing the intimacy of the relationship.

Sex with a coworker

To some, this might simply mean you are harbouring feelings for someone you see very regularly that you weren’t aware of.

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However, for others there might be a little bit more going on according to the dream expert.

Dreams about coworkers might be due to you admiring a quality they have according to Loewenberg (Gettty Stock Image)
Dreams about coworkers might be due to you admiring a quality they have according to Loewenberg (Gettty Stock Image)

Loewenberg argued: “A lot of the time sex dreams are “more about a psychological connection you need rather than a physical connection you want.”

The dream could simply be a manifestation of a quality or personality trait of your coworker that you admire or desire.

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So, no need to do anything rash and risk an email from HR after making them uncomfortable.

Sex with multiple people at once

Loewenberg argued that this dream could be about a lot more things besides sex despite its carnal nature.

She said: “A threesome or an orgy can mean you have too many things going on in your life or in your mind and you need to focus on one thing at a time.”

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She added that the anxiety of multiple obligations in your life can manifest into rather all encompassing sexual experiences while dreaming.

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