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Topics: Money, Sex and Relationships, Travel
Poppy Bilderbeck
Topics: Money, Sex and Relationships, Travel
A man has called upon social media users to help figure out whether he's in the wrong for going on holiday to celebrate his 40th without his girlfriend next year.
The reality is, if you've overthought your problem so much that you've typed your thoughts out onto Reddit's 'Am I The A**hole' thread and subjected yourself to swaths of comments, the likelihood is, you've probably answered your own question yourself.
However, once more, a man has taken to the thread in a bid to seek advice after leaving his girlfriend 'upset' over a bucket list trip for his 40th birthday she's likely not going to join him on.
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The Reddit user took to the popular thread three months ago to explain he's been dating someone six years younger than him for the last three months and things had been 'going well' until the 'topic of [his] birthday came up'.
Hitting the milestone of 40 next year, the user explained he wanted to take a proper holiday, having never gone on an 'actual vacation' before except to visit friends and family or go on work trips, never lasting more than three days.
Having worked hard to build a 'decent business' with 'money set aside,' he added: "I feel like I'm ready for a trip and next year would be a great opportunity."
What could go wrong eh? Well, while his girlfriend is 'great' and 'works hard and supports herself', the issue of money came up pretty quick.
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He explained she 'doesn't make as much money' as he does and 'is currently saddled with around $20k in credit card debt arising from a period of unexpected unemployment she had in the past that forced her to burn through savings and live on credit cards' - a spanner in the works for sure.
Despite this, when the idea of a holiday was brought up, the girlfriend asked to come along and even suggested Vegas, saying if it was international she'd be worried if she could 'afford it'.
The user offered to pay for where they stayed and also contribute to her airfare as well, but given they'd only been dating three months, drew the line at paying for the whole thing. Alas, more issues kept arising.
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The user's hopes for the Caribbean seemed shot down when she said she didn't think she could afford even 50 percent of the plane tickets or food.
The user then admitted he still 'intend[ed] to go' on a trip even if it was without her, however, his girlfriend became 'upset' he was OK traveling solo and 'it caused a bit of a fight'.
The issue has left his friends and family 'split' too, some referring back to his controlling ex and urging him to do what he wants to do, but others saying it's 'cruel to be planning a vacation in front of a person who is trying to pay off large amounts of debt anyway'.
And it's not taken long for people to weigh in.
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While the user's family and friends were divided, most Reddit users were not, resolving he is not, in fact, the a**hole.
One Reddit user said: "Person $20k in debt wants to go to Vegas. Perfect.
"NTA. Please go on your trip. It’s not cruel to anyone."
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Another wrote: "NTA. Red flag. You've been with her for only 3 MONTHS so far and she's already sulking for you not footing the entire bill for a trip for YOUR milestone birthday NEXT YEAR?"
A third said: "Three months and she expects you to either pay for her to go on an international, week-long vacation or change your long-term, bucket-list plans to suit her?
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"NTA You've got too much of your own life to let yourself be held back by someone you're barely invested in. She can either get over her fomo or you can find a new partner who is supportive."
To which the original user responded, agreeing his girlfriend has been 'great' and they've 'had a lot of fun' but if they can't navigate their relationship now they're out of the 'honeymoon' period then maybe she's 'not as great a fit as [he] thought' and he should 'move on'.
Ah well, plenty more fish in the sea eh? Or at least you won't be thinking about it when swimming in a literal one in the glorious sun.