Woman Reveals Toxic List Of Rules Her Boyfriend Made For Her When She’s At University

Rhiannon Ingle

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Woman Reveals Toxic List Of Rules Her Boyfriend Made For When She's At University@ccarollynn/TikTok

A young woman has shared the 11 rules that were given to her by her ex-boyfriend before she left home for university.

Some of these toxic rules include never turning off her Snapchat location, staying away from all boys and having her outfits pre-approved by him.

Carolyn took to TikTok, @ccarollynn, to share a screenshot of the message she received.

Captioning the TikTok clip that now has more than 2.7 million views with ‘i wish i was joking’, she reads out each of the 11 rules she received with a message header of ‘Rules for Carolyn’, followed by ‘PAY ATTENTION’ in all capitals.

Check it the full list below:


Upon introducing the short video, Carolyn says, ‘I thought it would be funny to do a reading of the rules my crazy, controlling ex-boyfriend sent me before leaving for college,’ to which she proceeded to read each one out.

Responding to rule number three that states, ‘Approve all outfits you wear past me or my mom,’ Carolyn responds, ‘I don’t see what you or your mum have to do with what I wear.’

Accompanied by other rules such as ‘absolutely no drinking’ and ‘no crop tops or tight clothing’ follows the most alarming, ‘Be in your dorm by 9pm every night and FaceTime me so I know you are alone.’

After the original video gained so much traction, Carolyn has since already made several follow-up TikToks to further explain the deeply concerning situation.

In one of the subsequent TikToks, Carolyn explains to her viewers how they can go about getting help from abusive relationships, as well as apologising if her initial video came across as insensitive.

‘I just want to say that behaviour is considered abuse. That’s considered emotionally controlling and abusive, and if you are in an abusive relationship, domestic violence, anything like that – there are tons of help resources and hotlines you can call,’ added the TikToker.

Woman Reveals Toxic List Of Rules Her Boyfriend Made For When She's At University (TikTok)@ccarollynn/TikTok

The videos now have thousands of comments, with many offering support, detailing their own similar experiences or calling out the toxic actions of the ex-boyfriend.

One TikTok user said, ‘This is not just insecure this is abusive,’ and another added, ‘This whole thing breaks my heart, I’m glad you got out of that.’

If you are experiencing domestic violence, please know that you are not alone. You can talk in confidence 24 hours a day to the national domestic violence helpline Refuge on 0808 2000 247

Topics: Viral, domestic abuse, rules, TikTok, University


  1. Mirror

    Woman shares 'terrifying' list of rules boyfriend gave her when she went to university

Rhiannon Ingle

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