Topics: Mental Health, Sexual Abuse, Celebrity, Entertainment, Film and TV
**Trigger warning: This story contains references to sexual abuse and suicide**
Actor Kevin Smith has revealed that he'd checked into a psychiatric facility after suffering from a mental health emergency.
The Clerks star said that he experienced a 'scary' mental health emergency which made him completely 'break from reality’.
Thankfully, the 52-year-old was able to get medical care he needed and is now sharing his story with others in the hopes that it will help someone who might be having a similar experience.
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Bravely speaking to People, he described the incident as ‘scary’ and confessed that he'd struggled with suicidal thoughts.
“At that moment, I wouldn’t have been averse to not being around any longer. I called a friend and said, ‘I’m in a weird, dark place. I need to go somewhere and get help’.” he said.
Smith also said that he'd hid behind his comic alter-ego, Silent Bob, to avoid the trauma of his childhood.
"I was already a self-loathing mess. 'The other guy' became my favorite piece of clothing to wear. I'd just let him take over," he said.
Smith revealed that he’d been sexually abused at just six years old, when he was forced to perform sex acts on a young girl by a much older boy from his neighbourhood.
He’d shrugged off the incident as ‘just playing doctor in an alleyway’, but when the Dogma actor disclosed what had happened to a therapist, they told him: "When a third party is instructing you to do something against your core values like that…that's sexual abuse."
The actor also said he was traumatised further after being fat-shamed as a child by his fourth grade teacher.
He said: "I felt disgusting, like I didn't matter. That's when 'the other guy' started to appear. I decided to be entertaining and make people love me before they noticed I was fat."
Smith spent a month at Arizona’s Sierra Tucson undergoing treatment to help him address his deep-seated trauma, which included attending group therapy with veterans struggling with PTSD.
"In the beginning, it was tough to share when somebody's talking about watching their friend get killed and I'm like, 'Well, my fourth-grade teacher told me I was fat'," said Smith, adding: “But I learned that there's no differentiation [between levels of trauma] to the human nervous system.
"Internally, trauma is trauma."
Although the Tusk star is still learning how to be his 'authentic self', he emphasised the importance of ‘taking care of your mind’ to fans.
He also revealed that he made several major lifestyle changes, including reducing how much weed he smokes and time spent on social media, as well as taking on fewer work projects.
Smith also began using the mindfulness exercise that he was taught, like concentrating on his breathing, which he described as 'eye-opening'.
"I'm terrified to see everyone's reaction to [all of this]," said Smith, adding: "But I know there's somebody out there who doesn't know this stuff—like I didn't—who could get something out of this."
If you've been affected by any of the issues in this article and want to speak to someone in confidence, you can contact men's health charity Movember here
You can also contact Mental Health America. Call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org. You can also reach Crisis Text Line by texting MHA to 741741.
